Dad Wants to Watch a Movie

Before my sister and I were born, my parents routinely had pizza at their favorite place then caught a movie on Friday nights. After we entered the picture, they kept the tradition but adjusted it to ordering pizza delivery and watching a movie as a family. Perhaps it’s no surprise that I keep a movie blog all these years later. When I was young, I didn’t appreciate it enough – having something, even something trivial, to look forward to at the end of every single week was helpful through the weekly challenges of school, friends, sports, or anything else. It was an escape from those pressures when I needed one, a fun part of the routine when things were good, but most importantly it was an anchor that reminded us that the week was just a week, and every week ends. As we got older and started making our own plans outside of the house, it was reassuring to know that movie night would always be there in case plans didn’t come together or fell through. From my parents’ point of view, it was a way to smuggle in a few hours of quiet that still counted as family time. As time went on and I started growing up a little, I could tell whenever my parents were excited about sharing a particular movie with me. Whether it was something they were raised on or grew to love, every so often we weren’t renting something new from Blockbuster (remember that?!?!) but they were choosing something specific for us.

Now that I have a daughter of my own, I’m excited to share my passion for movies with her while also creating some kind of “family ritual” that will be as reliably stable as the one I grew up with. I don’t know what it’ll look like exactly, but I can’t wait to find out. It’s a risky endeavor, because when I share a movie that I deeply love with someone I care about, I feel pretty vulnerable; if it’s not a hit, it can be gutting. I’ll have to develop some thick skin to deal with an inevitable “this is SOOO old, Dad” or an “I’m bored” or, God forbid, “can we watch something else??” Hopefully I raise my daughter to be polite enough in how she asks, but kids are gonna do what they’re gonna do.

Setting aside that fear and acknowledging that a lot of our viewing time will be spent on whatever’s new, attention-grabbing, eye-popping, and hopefully not too mind-numbing, I’ve put together a syllabus of the movies I can’t wait to share with her. I know there’s some saying out there about the best-laid plans, but Grace doesn’t understand that yet so I won’t abide by it.

1. Cinderella

• When? As soon as we’re ok with her looking at screens

• Why? Because I’ve got a daughter and it’s Cinderella, let’s not think too hard.

• If she likes it? More princesses! Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, and even 3-D newer stuff like Moana and Frozen are on tap, as are dress-up and tea parties. If she wants a princess who also fights, Mulan is a great starting place.

2. The Lion King

• When? 4 or 5, it’s okay if she is freaked out by Scar and the hyenas, as long as it doesn’t ruin her day.

• Why? Look, the masterpieces are just masterpieces. The style, power, and majesty of this movie are undeniable, and it’s a great entry point for Shakespearean familial and political storytelling.

• If she likes it? More non-princess stuff – they’re certainly lesser than The Lion King, but I remember liking Jungle Book and Robin Hood (1973).

3. Monsters, Inc.

• When? 4 or 5

• Why? This was a mainstay in the early-2000s Rymer household and is as fun and sweet as you could hope for without getting too heavy. Also, as my daughter has continued to grow, I’ve realized she might just end up looking like Boo.

• If she likes it? More Pixar, so Toy Story, Finding Nemo (the opening might be tough), Ratatouille, and A Bug’s Life to start. When she’s ready for a little heavier subject matter and danger, The Incredibles, Up, Wall-E, and Inside Out to talk about her feelings and letting go of Imaginary Friends.

4. Spirited Away

• When? 7 or 8

• Why? I think it’s important to open her up to other cultures and ways of thinking about the world early in life, but this movie features slightly scarier imagery than Disney stuff and heavier ideas of spirit realms, the afterlife, environmentalism, and the darkness within.

• If she likes it? I might do My Neighbor Totoro before this movie since it’s a little gentler, but if this is a gateway into Studio Ghibli then Howl’s Moving Castle would be a worthy follow-up. She might also be ready for one of my favorites, Fantastic Mr. Fox, but she won’t appreciate its wit for a while.

5. Star Wars

• When? 7 or 8 per my wife, but I think it was earlier for me and look at me now.

• Why? Is it perhaps THE classic foundational blockbuster? If it goes well, it’ll expand her imagination and appreciation for live-action movies, and she might be warm to more sci-fi or fantasy stuff. If it goes poorly, she’ll be able to knowingly roll her eyes at the boys who are obsessed with it.

• If she likes it? More Star Wars, certainly, but this will also lead to the classic blockbusters like Raiders of the Lost Ark, Jaws (we’ll wait a little longer on that one), Back to the Future, E.T. – you know, the GOATs.

6. The Princess Bride

• When? 8 or 9

• Why? This is a pretty special movie to me, but it’s a VERY special movie to my little sister. By now, Grace has been raised on princess movies long enough to know how this movie plays with them, celebrates them, but most importantly celebrates the relationship between the person reading the story and the person hearing it

• If she likes it? The Princess Diaries, Ever After, Jumanji, Home Alone, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, A League of Their Own

7. Singin’ In the Rain

• When? Whenever honestly.

• Why? It’s hard to top a good live-action musical, and I don’t want her to be put off by movies that existed before 1980.

• If she likes it? The Sound of Music, West Side Story, White Christmas, An American in Paris, The Wizard of Oz

8. Little Women (2019)

• When? 10

• Why? This spot isn’t just reserved for new classics, or a chance for Grace to get to see characters like herself onscreen dealing with things she can immediately relate to, but for book adaptations. Reading will be important in our house, probably even more important than movies, and it’s hard to adapt a beloved classic better than this.

• If she likes it? Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility, 10 Things I Hate About You, the other Little Women. Caroline would be very upset if I didn’t mention one of her all-time favorites at this age range, Clue.

9. It’s a Wonderful Life

• When? 12 or 13; not just because of the threat of suicide that hangs over the film, but you’ve gotta pay some attention to the money

• Why? This is on the shortlist of my favorite movies ever made, and it’s on the shortlist for my Dad too – it’s hard to explain, but I felt like I knew him a little better after I saw it and realized how special it was to him.

• If she likes it? Casablanca, tamer Hitchcock movies like North by Northwest or To Catch a Thief, All About Eve if I’m feeling bold.

10. The Godfather

• When? 15+

• Why? Probably the greatest movie ever, definitely my favorite ever, and I honestly don’t care if she doesn’t love it (though almost everyone does).  

• If she likes it? I think this is also a good time to show her All the President’s Men since it’s so dialogue heavy, but we would also watch Godfather Part II and when she’s a little older, GoodFellas. The dumb teenage boys won’t stand a chance if she’s already seen all their favorites.